my humbled & hopeful before picture

This is the second post in a series about the weight loss/transformation 
plan I'm doing through Revelation Wellness - Weigh Less to Feed More. 

I've been craving that before and after picture. Occasionally bloggers I love will post one on instagram and I'm just inspired and floored. A few weeks ago, when Stephanie "Honey Holden" posted a before + after picture from her wellness journey, I immediately messaged her and just told her how inspired I was by her. I'd see those pictures and just hope, pray, hope - that one day I could have a before & after picture. But there was one major problem. I wasn't willing to have a "before". 

I told Alisa, I'm not sure what led me to breaking down and emailing her and I don't even super remember doing it. I sort of knew in the back of my head that I'd be seeing her at Jesus at the Core later that month, but it was definitely an impulse decision. Now, a few weeks later - I have a a few of her incredible teachings under my belt. I have her daily accountability and the workbooks on my desk that I'm pouring over every chance I get. And sure enough, this past weekend, I got to meet her sweet self (and pick her up! - see pic below) at Jesus at the Core. The event in and of itself was so incredibly life giving. Alisa, along with Brooke Boon of Holy Yoga (and their amazing team of helpers) spoke so much truth over us as we moved our bodies and the Lord moved in our hearts. But you know what was the predominant feeling I had? I was crazy humbled. 

I've gained and lost over 50 pounds twice since I was 18. I've read more vegan cookbooks and articles on metabolism than I could count. I have studied nutrition and stood on the scale, but still - this is where I am. My heart, is kind of a mess as it relates to body image. My body, is out of shape and not where it once has been. I need wisdom. I need leading. I need the Lord. 

I'm two weeks in and I'll tell you this - the Lord is showing up. I am truly walking in new found freedom as it relates to some serious food addictions I had. I am starting to agree with the Lord that He will, He IS, doing a new thing and He is growing me. I'm seeing fruit as it pertains to my body and what it is able to do. But a few weeks ago? I knew what I needed to do - I needed to take a before picture. I needed to admit that I needed help. So, even though she never asked for it, I took one and sent it to Alisa. I told her - this is my before picture that I've never wanted to take. Instead of hiding and never growing, I want to be humbled and hopeful. 

And now I can even share it on the internet with joy. 
No funky camera angles or instagram filters. No flattering outfits or makeup to distract you. 
This was me a few weeks ago, and by God's grace I'll never be that girl again because as my body is growing and finding freedom, my heart is leaping ahead - never looking back. 
In hope. 
In humility. 
Because it is for freedom that we've been set free. 

If you're looking for freedom as it pertains to health + wellness, I can't suggest checking out Revelation Wellness enough. Alisa has at home programs, online programs, videos, and so much more. She is all about Jesus and she is out for freedom for women.