How Will You Talk to Them When It’s Over?

Feb 23

Ever think about how tense it is now in the world? Everyone seems absolutely at each other’s throats. Of course, I’m not naive enough to believe that tensions will only get palpable in 2020. But I do think a global pandemic may have exposed what was already beneath the surface: a lot of people struggling with trust, compassion, and the capacity to hope the best in one another.

As someone who spends a lot of time online, I see this and think about it a lot. I wish I lived in a world where I could pretend like everything is ok all the time. Actually - I don’t wish that at all. But I do watch people yelling at others, either directly or indirectly online, and wonder:

How will you talk to them when it’s all over?

Let’s say you’re just wildly righteously angry about something someone or some people group is engaging in, and you just let it fly. Because YOU’RE RIGHT and THEY’RE WRONG, and that matters. I get it.

But let’s say best case scenario, their heart changes, and their behavior shifts, and you meet them somewhere on the street or even in church. What would you say if they came humbly and told you about how they repented and changed their mind?

Would you say, “Thank God - because you were the worst.” No, probably not, right?

So here’s my no filter question for today:

Why would you speak differently to someone before they agree with you vs. after they do? And actually, aren’t you more likely to win them to your correct thinking if you treat them with dignity and respect, humility and kindness?

And here’s one more no filter kicker question for those who are brave:

Remember when Jesus said it’s not only wrong to murder, it’s wrong to have murderous and hateful thoughts in your heart? What if we, as women of God, shifted the way we speak about people - not just with our mouths or through our fingers online - but also in our thoughts and prayers?

The thing is: I think if we shift this, we might just see the world change, including those people with who we so ardently disagree.

Comment on this post, + let’s talk about it: what would it look like to speak to people, even when we disagree with them, even in our hearts?